*Warning: sarcasm ahead

Fellow toddlers, this blog post is for you. It’s no secret that we, as a collective, love pasta. Macaroni is a staple of our diet. If we could swing it, we would exist solely on pasta and other flour-based products. But often there are those in our lives that don’t always agree with our selective tastes, and are constantly trying to broaden our horizons. That’s where I come in.

I’m here to offer you advice to help ensure that you can stick to your preferred diet of pasta and bread. If you follow my advice, I will go so far as to guarantee the results … but only if you stick with it. As with anything else involving our parents, consistency is key. The worst thing you can do is to start this regime and then give up when you feel some push back – setting the standard that you can be easily swayed. This would not only hurt your future attempts, but also your siblings, and others to come after you.

Ok, so here are my top tips:

1. First, I would recommend that you start with some personal reflection. Where do you stand on this topic? What are your favourite foods? What will you refuse to eat? Where do you draw the line when you inevitably feel some push back? If you have a sibling, be sure to consult with them. Find out what’s worked with your particular set of parents – they are all a bit different – and then modify your approach as needed.
2. Start with cutlery and dishes. Choose a favourite and demand it every time. Don’t like the red sippy cup lid on the green sippy cup? Let it be known. Prefer a different fork for each food item on your plate? Demand it. Repetition is key here.
3. Practice and hone various techniques: pushing away your plate, tossing food on the ground, spitting it out. Pick up new ideas on play dates.
4. This is important. When new food items are introduced to you, display your dislike immediately. We need to discourage this behavior so that your parents will eventually stick with the tried and true menu items. The longer your parent has spent preparing some fancy new item, the stronger your dislike should be displayed.
5. Do not give up. Support groups exist – use them. Share your experiences and challenges with siblings and other children you meet. They’ve all been through this. They were successful and eventually you will be too.
6. Your parents may have read about a new technique where they set out a variety of food and let you choose what to put on your plate. Do not be tempted by this false impression of choice and freedom. If you want pasta for dinner for the fifth time this week, do not be swayed. Select only the items you truly crave.
7. Some days are harder than others. If you feel like you are losing a battle, at the very least demand that the food item be smothered in the condiment of your choice. Ketchup is typically our go-to recommendation, but whatever you’ve demanded in the past, stick with it. Again, consistency is key in developing a routine with your parents.
8. If a particular meal time isn’t going your way, if all else fails, display your displeasure with other behavior. Stand up and sit down repeatedly, leave the table, etc … whatever you can do to maintain some control of the situation.

Whatever happens, remember: you can do this. It may be difficult at times to see your parents struggle, but the end result far outweighs the challenges. We all deserve a pasta-rich diet. That lifestyle can be yours, with just a bit of commitment and dedication.